Experiencing - January 31, 2012

My current favorite meditation is to attend to the experiencer of the thoughts, sensations, feelings, everything that arises in consciousness. Today I emerged from this meditation fully in the grasp of experiencing, seemingly on the other side of the usual creator of the experience. It was as if my purpose was to experience what is, right now. It included flowing from meditation to yoga sun salutations which continued as pure experience, not from the perspective of the doer, but as the experiencer of the movements, light, sensation, and was entirely different than usual.

I then moved, without intention, just noticing that I had gone downstairs where my husband was sitting in the living room reading the paper and I simply took in the view of a man smiling, saying good morning, reading the paper, which had a large turquoise ad on the lifted page, sunlight infusing the scene, peaceful, silent, stillness. I then made myself a cup of tea and brought it upstairs to write this note. I'm still having the sensation of experiencing this writing, rather than doing the writing.  There is a woman, sitting at a desk with warm, milky tea, enjoying morning sunshine and typing words on a laptop.

It seems as though my purpose is to experience, as if the small me is a sensory processor of what is out there and the experiencer gets to enjoy it.

Once again it is sensation of being a verb rather than a noun. Experiencing captures the essence better than experiencer. I can't locate an experiencer ... I can experience experiencing. What a precious gift.